Calling off the search due to a shit storm...

Sadly, the search for my beloved baby chihuahua puppy has ended.. Yes.. it's hard to believe.. but after 3 attempts and 6 months of research to find my perfect puppy, I've lost the drive to even want a puppy anymore. I tried to buy 3 separate puppies and all 3 deals fell through.. one sold right before I called, one sold after I called and said I wanted the puppy, and the 3rd I gave up on myself after hearing Tim rant and rave about dog responsibilities.. I wasn't ready to bring a puppy into the house if he wasn't "on board" with me 100%. I'm super depressed over this and spent most of the weekend laying on the couch watching TV and pouting over my recent downs in my life. I know everybody goes through these times, and darn it, IT'S MY TURN. I'm gonna let myself be depressed over it, and why the hell not? For once, I'm not going to play Pollyanna and reason the good things over why all this bad stuff is happening my life. Furthermore, "everything happens for a reason" isn't cutting it this time for me. I'm pissed at the world in general and I refuse to laugh and let all this stuff just roll by. Maybe by the fall, the gloomiest time of the year in Chicago, I will feel much better.